=== 4:36 PM ===
Yeah! I got the writing table at my favorite coffee shop. So called, because many write. Here, over all the other tables.
I should be writing my timeline. I had discussed it with the guy who evaluated my functional capacity. Today he reminded me. My timeline will help fill out his evaluation.
My timeline from my journals. I have five years. In them I discuss all my experiences. Once I realized.
Journaling keeps me sane. I have found. It works best if I pour my soul. Lavishly, on the page.
And, that’s what I did. Starting before it ever occurred to me. Maybe I should discuss what I notice with my doctor? The notion was vague, that the state of ship was amiss.
They cover everything from my thoughts on life and death, to the detail of each day playing out. The ones worth remembering.
When I started using my cane. How I thought. Still. That it wouldn’t get too bad.
Too soon. It got worse. And I discussed everything, from why I plopped onto the couch and fell asleep, right after work, to the pain that woke me in the middle of the night. What else to do when I can’t sleep, but write?
And these journals also describe the sick days I took. They agree with my former employer’s records. How I never took many sick days until the last two years. And how they grew in frequency. And why.
I also have to write a cover letter for the evaluation report. To the bureaucrats of the insurancy. I want to make myself perfectly clear.
Don’t contest this any further. You will lose. You have no valid arguments regarding my case.
That’s essentially what it is. Right? Will my case stand up in a court of law? That’s gotta be how they evaluate each one. If we drop him, with the evidence we have seen so far, will the lawyers win?
In a suit?
So, my cover-letter needs to detail all of the evidence I have. Just to be perfectly clear. They will not!
It was the insight that allowed me to stop worrying about the situation. My weakness is the strength of my case.
I need to spell it out, in my own unique way. Because I am not merely providing the insurancy my evidence. I am telling them how to see it. Without ever stating my intentions directly.
I want the power of language. Spoken. Honestly to paint. A picture in their minds.
I want them to see it. From my position, they lose.
In a court of law, they have no case. They will see it.
When I crush their collective will.