I want your permission.

To spread my thoughts among many short posts.  Because, I don’t have the energy to sustain my writing.  I am discouraged by my lack of progress. I want to share many things with you.  But, I may have to stretch my thoughts out over several days.

Some days I can only write a few sentences.  Others, I may post more pieces, or larger pieces.  Look for the common narrative.

In order to fulfill my promise to post daily, I will do it in short pieces.

I can no longer write lengthy pieces.  I will tell you why tomorrow.

But, for now, understand that I will stretch my narrative out over days, because this is the only way I seem to be able to work.

Today.

I am merely demonstrating how I want my posts to be understood.  If I write many short posts with titles, look for the narrative.  My narrative will be found among and between the posts.  I am forced to resort to this because of my muscular dystrophy.

There.  In my last post I mentioned that I would soon tell you why I am forced to write in small posts.  And now I am telling you.

I write in small posts because everything is difficult for me right now.  This is how muscular dystrophy affects me.

My pact with you. Our common understanding.

I am going to begin posting a new narrative to my blog.

When I began this blog, I thought I knew what I wanted to say. My problem was that I had not yet identified the proper voice for sharing my thoughts.  And, I hadn’t fully understood my need to really distinguish what belongs on my blog, what belongs in my book, and what should remain in my own journal.

But, now that I have worked some of this out, I would like to begin sharing it with you.  But, I am going to share it in a series short posts that, in aggregation will tell a story.  There is a reason for this.  I promise to share this with you in due time.

I promise to post daily, beginning at some future date in the not too distant future.  I will begin posting daily after I have accumulated enough pieces to sustain my inevitable droughts.  I will tell you when my daily posting will begin.

Soon.  I promise.

Soon.

 

What is it like to wear a CPAP?

I slept hard last night.  My second night, not fussing with my new CPAP.  I’m getting comfortable with the machine.

Wearing one is a trade off.  Yes, it is slightly cumbersome.  But, I have had too many episodes in the middle of the night.  Needing to roll to my side.  Then, forcing myself up, so I can breathe again.

Not breathing is way more uncomfortable than wearing a mask that blows air into my nose, while I dream.  And waking, after a full night of deep and easy breaths, is damned refreshing.

I guess it took me three nights to get used to the mask.  The first night was my sleep-study return-visit, in which I was fitted for the mask.  I had a chance to try it out, and ask questions, and to be reassured.  That was over two weeks ago.

Then, my second and third nights were this past Wednesday and Thursday, in my own bed.  It took a while for the medical supply company to fill my prescription.

My first two nights of not waking were Friday and Saturday.  Even now, at least six hours after opening my eyes this morning, I feel better.  More alert.  Less winded.

I gladly wear this mask.  And, hope that my two cats don’t extend their claws while exploring this thing that connects my face, through a flex tube, to the grid.